I know it can sometimes feel like you’re alone in this thing. Times when it feels so dark, it’s an effort to get out of bed and take a shower. Moments when it feels absurdly painful, and like no one can really see you or know you. But that’s all illusion. Most of the things in life that cause us suffering are universal: grief, doubt, fear, attachment, loss, expectation, desire, shame, rage and loneliness. And there are people who care, and can see you, and want to offer a hand, or a flashlight or a shovel if you need to dig your way out of some darkness. (You’ll probably have to manage the shower on your own, though ;)).

For the vast majority of time here, you will be alone with your thoughts. Even if you’re in a crowded room. Examining your thoughts is essential because if you’re in a dark fog, that’s the way to begin to let some light in. If you’re telling yourself, “No one cares” or “People suck”, or “I suck”, start there. Because everyone you meet has pain. Private struggles and anguish and hopes and fears. It’s not a level playing field to be sure; some people will face loss that breaks the heart wide open and makes it an effort just to breathe in and breathe out. But I don’t believe this is an easy gig for anyone. Be gentle with yourself, but don’t run from your pain because it’s faster than you and you cannot win that race. Try if you need to, but you’ll just become exhausted and hopeless and eventually you’ll run yourself into a corner where you believe no one can see you or understand. See what I’m getting at here?

If you can recognize that we are all vulnerable and human and full of confusion sometimes, and joy in others, that we will all face obstacles and make mistakes and have our hearts broken and surprise ourselves and keep growing and learning, then you’ll begin to realize you’re never alone. We’re all in this thing together. Be kind to yourself and everyone you encounter. Do whatever you can to spread some love and some light. Take good care of yourself so you can take good care of the people in your life. And don’t allow your thoughts to convince you that you are alone. Sending you love and a big hug, Ally